Oh good grief!

So, here's one of the multitude of funny things that happened over two days in the field. At the start of day two, roughly 4:45 A.M., we're all wandering around when an instructor we've never seen before appears in camp. He's an NCO, I'm guessing, about 5'5" and Hispanic, not that it's all that relevant, but at any rate, he's a friendly guy, all smiles. So what's funny about that? Well, just to bring everyone up to speed, from what I gather, pretty much everyone in the Army has their own pre-prepared motto to yell back at you if you yell one in their general direction, or salute, or whatever. Sometimes, if you're of high enough rank, just walking into a room is enough to get everybody to stand up in unison and yell. I know, I know: I'm not totally on board with this whole custom myself, but I'm a team player, and hey, yelling isn't rocket science, so I'm willing to go along with it. Anyway, an example of this lovely custom: if you acknowledge an enlisted solider-in-training around Ft. Sam, they will salute you and yell, "Train to Save!" Why "Train to Save"? Well, this is the training site for pretty much everybody who has anything to do with the Army medical companies, so that part seems appropriate. All of the yelling? Yeah, I'm still working out why that's necessary. ANYWAY, back to the OBC field instructor. So here's his deal: any time you pass him on post, he leans forward and says, with this ridiculous amount of sincerity, "Ma'am...staaaaay motivated!" What? There is something so hilarious about that, and I don't even know what it is. Do I look unmotivated? Is he trying to taunt me? Worse yet, is he being totally genuine, which is entirely possible? So, by the time 7:00 A.M. rolls around, I've passed this guy and gotten, oh, probably three or four "Ma'am...staaaaay motivated!"-s, and I'm having a harder and harder time not laughing with each successive time because he is just so sincere about the whole thing, which makes it extra hilarious. So, I got a reprieve when each of us headed out into the Blackjack-filled wilderness for individual navigation exerises around 7:30 A.M. So like I mentioned in the previous post, my exercise went really well: I found all my points, and life is good. However, what I skimmed over in that version of the story is that even after finding all four points, I was still roughly over a mile from camp, it was 90 degrees outside and I was wearing that blasted Kevlar helmet with an outfit that no one in their right mind should be wearing in the summer in Texas. Anway, I took off walking back to camp, but needless to say, at that point I was hot, and tired and I knew I had a good 30 minute walk in the hot sun over rough terrain ahead of me. So, 15 minutes into it, and really far away from any chance of getting out of the hot sun, I see a Humvee turn the corner and come towards me, slowing down as it approaches. Seriously, I was so delirious that this was my thought process: "Yes! I'm going to get a ride back to camp! This is so awesome...how lucky can I be! I knew I couldn't stand one more minute in the hot sun...praise the Lord!" Needless to say, by this point, I'm mentally halfway into the Humvee, as it pulls up alongside of me. I look up and see Mr. Happy Go Lucky Instructor driving the vehicle. He leans out the window and addresses me: "Ma'am?", followed by this dramatic pause, which I'm thinking, surely, is going to be followed up by, "Hey, it's too hot out here: we'll give you a ride back," or, "Hop in!", right? Ohhhh nooooo. Instead, he leans out the window and yells, "Staaaaay motivated!" AND DRIVES AWAY! Doh! So needless to say, anytime something crappy happens from now on, you can totally count on someone around here to yell, "Staaaaaaay motivated!" in your general direction. Oh good grief!